Transcript for 9. Unwanted Platen

INTRODUCTION – WALTER’S APARTMENT

[Whitney is sitting at Walter’s desk staring at the radio.]

[Walter enters.]

WALTER

You do know the radio won’t turn on by itself.

WHITNEY

Of course!

WALTER

Practicing telepathy again?

WHITNEY

No! I haven’t in years. I’m waiting for the top of the hour.

WALTER

What happens then?

WHITNEY

My new favorite show will be on.

WALTER

Great… another show for you to listen to.

WHITNEY

Troubles… this one is different. You’d love it! It’s about a Det. Dan Kent trying to find the murder of a children’s show host. It has murder. Clowns. A dental cult. Puppets–

WALTER

On the radio?!?

WHITNEY

Time travel. Clowns.

WALTER

You’ve said that one already.

WHITNEY

And musical numbers!

WALTER

I’m not so sure…

WHITNEY

Just give it a try!

WALTER

Look at that… it’s the top of the hour.

WHITNEY

Goody!

[Whit turns the radio on.]

[CLICK.]

[House of Sunshine trailer plays.]

WHITNEY

Well?

WALTER

That was wonderful! When does it come on again?

STATIC ANNOUNCER

You too can listen to season 1 and 2 of the Fall of the House of Sunshine. Just tune in by visiting Apple Podcasts, Google Play, Stitcher, or any other preferred podcatcher out there. It’ll warm your heart and more. Brought to you by KPOW and sponsored by Fate Crafters Studios.

INT. THE NOTHINGNESS

[CLICK.]

[Static, repeated ‘Do you listen to KPOW?’ and ‘my favorite show will be on!’]

[STATIC.]

[Happy music]

MISSY

For a level of sophistication above all other cigarettes, choose Twilight Toasties. Twilight Toasties, the only prenatal vitamin cigarettes from Spishak. I’m not just their spokesperson, I’m also avid smoker. My first two pregnancies produced tragic results. But my husband was undeterred.

[baby cooing, crying throughout. Sounds of ambiguous creeping mass.]

So I made the switch from Enfield No. 2 cigarette’s to Twilight Toasties prenatal vitamin cigarettes. And you know what? It worked. Now I’m the proud mother of three children. Do they have all their organs and appendages? No, but they’re breathing and I shudder to think where we’d be without the help of Spishak’s science division. Each full bodied drag my body was absorbing all the nutrients my baby could need or want. Unlike most pregnacies, there weren’t any sleepless nights during those seven months. One puff of my Twilight Toasties and I was out for up to ten hours!

[distorted crying]

And what about my figure you ask? Their patented formula was even better than advertised. I weighed even less then I did before pregnancy. Ensuring that I’m still the apple of my man’s eye. Those are the kind of results you can count on with Twilight Toasties. You can rest knowing the doctors at Spishak’s secret location headquarters stand behind these results and assure me that these are the best a mother could ask for while still enjoying her god given right to smoke. Spishak; leading the way to America’s future.

[STATIC.]

[a distorted phone ringing, dial tone]

[CLICK.]

INT. DETECTIVE JOY’S OFFICE – NIGHT

[Joy stands in front of a cork board with all current evidence pinned to it. Keets struggles to stay awake.]

DETECTIVE JOY

Keets. Get some coffee from the break room.

KEETS

We’ve been at this all day.

DETECTIVE JOY

Sorry pal, real police work doesn’t end till the case gets closed.

KEETS (Yawn)

I guess that’s how you– you got so good.

DETECTIVE JOY

You will too one day.

KEETS

Jesus, it’s already morning.

DETECTIVE JOY

Come on. Get on your feet. It’ll perk you up. Get your blood flowing.

[Keets walks in place.]

KEETS

Okay. My blood flowing.

DETECTIVE JOY

That’s the right idea. Now read me back our notes again.

KEETS

Okay. Okay now. [stops walking] Okay. First victim… victims? The two men originally were thought to have fallen from a seventh floor window accidently. Though interviews with neighbors we were able to piece together a possible argument had erupted from a issue with a radio programs volume. One neighbor claimed to hear them shouting about the radio’s frequency. (Beat) Odd… that should probably read volume. Eh, I’m sure that’s what they meant. Uh, let’s see. Autopsy did show that Mr. Timothy Funk though having died at impact with the ground that he had suffered bite marks to his throat… human bite marks. The other man Mr. Brian Wilcox showed no additional trauma outside of what was to be expected… y’know, due to the impact. It is unknown whether Wilcox had indeed been the biter as his teeth were no longer housed with in his head. (Pause) Second victim was Moira Kowalski… and there is no additional information here in the file with the exception of–

DETECTIVE JOY (distorted)

Skip this one for now. I know the details.

KEETS

As the only thing noted here is there was no connection in perpetrator to the previous crime. The connection was made after the third victim came to light. (Beat) Let’s see… third victim Mr. Harold Orville. Multiple stab wounds in addition to a large… Oh jesus… a uh… large…

[He chokes back his lunch.]

DETECTIVE JOY

Please continue.

KEETS

Large incision… A large incision from the victims belly to their jaw. A… uh… a kiss was planted on the victim’s lips post mortem. Shade of lipstick was matched to a wife’s personal belongs. Wife was not present at the scene and is believed to be the perpetrator in the crime. She is consider to be at large. No murder weapon was ever recovered.

DETECTIVE JOY

Any update on the wife?

KEETS

None listed here in the file.

[Silence. Phone rings in distance. Clock ticks.]

KEETS

I’ll just follow up.

DETECTIVE JOY

Proceed. Details on the room?

KEETS

At the Orville residence… the kitchen was turned inside out. Cabinets thrown open and contents scattered about. Utensils, baking ingredients… large pooling of water… possible urine? Urine….? The radio was still powered on and tuned into KPOW. The bedroom was also turned over and clothes were shredded.

DETECTIVE JOY (Contemplative)

KPOW… (Beat) Do you listen to KPOW?

KEETS

I… Yeah, I used to. Especially as a boy. Back in New York? The Masked Cowpoke was my favorite.

DETECTIVE JOY

I don’t know that one.

[background, train and Wild West noises build]

KEETS

Oh… You have no idea what you were missing! There was this one episode where The Masked Cowpoke needed to retrieve his gun from the men who were holding him prisoner. So he uses Cookie’s grease from- Oh Cookie was another character. He–

DETECTIVE JOY

Keets?!? In regards to my question… your answer remains no, correct?

KEETS

Yes. My wife does though!

DETECTIVE JOY

Hm?

KEETS

The show Love, Honor and Decay. She loves it. She’s been trying to get me to listen to it but…

DETECTIVE JOY

Don’t like soap operas?

KEETS

No, no it’s not that. The one time I’ve been home to sit with her and listen the signal kept getting interrupted. By a… voice. A strange voice.

DETECTIVE JOY

Yes. We’ve had people calling in complaining that they think the communists might be trying to subvert our democracy through the radio programs.

KEETS

Uh… Um…

DETECTIVE JOY

It’s crazy talk Keets.

KEETS (distorted)

I’m so glad you said it sir. Wow.

[Gans knocks on the office glass and lets himself in. Music cuts]

GANS

Pardon me gentlemen, the chief is asking for all hands on deck.

DETECTIVE JOY

Where’s the fire?

GANS

I don’t understand that reference but there was a riot that broke out in the main part of Hollywood. Chief asked me to round up Keets and let you know to carry on without him for now.

DETECTIVE JOY

Okay. Keets, be back here in my office by 11 am.

KEETS

Yeah. Sure thing.

[Keets heads to exit.]

DETECTIVE JOY

Notes!

[Keets stops in his track and places the notepad onto Joy’s desk. He exits.]

DETECTIVE JOY

Gans?

GANS

Yes sir?

DETECTIVE JOY

Is the chief pulling you as well?

GANS

Can’t. Someone needs to man the evidence room. They sent the new guy down there so that just leaves me.

DETECTIVE JOY

Great. Before you head back there can you pull the complaint calls regarding that radio broadcast interruptions?

GANS

Sure.

[Gans attempts to exit.]

DETECTIVE JOY

All of them Gans.

GANS

Sure.

[He closes the door. Joy picks up her phone receiver and begins to dial a number.]

INT. THE NOTHINGNESS

[CLICK.]

[Distorted, deep voice]

[STATIC.]

[Donald is fast asleep, SNORING on the Davenport next to Louise who is nervously eating pages from a book.]

LOUISE

Wake up!

[Donald jolts awake.]

DONALD

PORK CHOPS!

LOUISE

Do you hear that?

DONALD

You startled me dear. Never jolt me awake. It’s bad self care.

LOUISE

Shh. Listen.

[Faint CLICKS from a typewriter. Repeated distant Donald’s lines echoed]

DONALD

What is that?

LOUISE

Someone is typing… Out there.

DONALD

I hear it. Oh god, I hear it. Why have we been forsaken?

LOUISE

Shh.

DONALD

There are no words to for us to speak.

LOUISE

Shh.

DONALD

No path for us to follow.

LOUISE

Shh.

DONALD

No food for us to eat. We will starve.

[Louise tears another page from the book and hands it over to him.]

LOUISE

Here.

[He takes it and puts it in his mouth.]

DONALD (Garbled)

We don’t know why Neville was here or why he wants the book. We don’t know what is in the book or even where it is. Why would James split his face open with an axe?

LOUISE

Answers to which we may never get.

DONALD

We need that book.

LOUISE

For Neville?

DONALD (chewing, swallows)

No. For us.

[STATIC.]

[‘Lady you put that away’, screaming, distorted]

[CLICK.]

INT. KOWALSKI’S HOME STUDY – NIGHT

[A door creaks open. Walter and Whitney slink into the room.]

WALTER

I told you it was this way.

WHITNEY

How do you know where this guy lives?

WALTER

We occupy the same city. And with someone as infamous as The Devil… you make it your business to know.

WHITNEY

It’s not that I doubted you. I just wasn’t sure how you were sure. That’s all.

WALTER

Whit, you have been with me long enough to know… (Spooky voice) I see all…

WHITNEY

Right. Of course, you’re the all seeing eye.

WALTER

Take that side of the room near the door. I’m sure everyone is asleep for the night… but you never know.

WHITNEY

Uh uh. Less talking, more looking. Come on.

WALTER

If you were a typewriter where would you be?

WHITNEY

Uh…On top of a desk. At least that’s where I would put it.

WALTER

No. I looked there. It was first thing I did. Try again.

WHITNEY

Eh. I give up.

WALTER

You used to be more fun.

WHITNEY

I’m not fun? I’m not fun? Eh, well. We used to risk our lives less often.

[Walter runs his hands along the inside of the desk.]

WALTER

There just might be a button…

WHITNEY

Can you explain this to me? Why are stealing the typewriter back from him?

WALTER

Because… I don’t like being tricked.

WHITNEY

Okay, this sounds like a bad idea.

WALTER

It’s the best reason.

WHITNEY

And you say The Devil guy… man is the baddest of the bad?

WALTER (chuckling)

Oh… he is.

WHITNEY

Right. So we have a bad reason and a bad plan. We’re in good shape.

WALTER

I mentioned that you used to be more fun right?

WHITNEY

Peachy.

WALTER (beat)

Ah.

WHITNEY
Ah?

WALTER

Yes. Ah.

WHITNEY

What?

WALTER

A button.

WHITNEY

Are you pressing the button?

WALTER

Do you think I should?

WHITNEY

Should you?

WALTER

Buttons under a desk usually lead to secret compartments. Secret compartments usually lead to things that one is looking for. I think we have to at this point.

[Walter presses the button. Silence. A loud alarm goes off. Adventurous music starts]

WHITNEY

Troubles? This is not good.

WALTER

That’s different.

WHITNEY

Okay, we’re going to have to go. Oh, peas and carrots. Troubles! We’re really in a fix now.

WALTER

Be at the ready Whit.

WHITNEY

I really should have made you get me the ice cream before we came.

WALTER

One to think on for next time!

[The door bursts open and five men shuffle into the room.]

WHITNEY

We got lucky! They only brought their fists!

WALTER

Evening chaps. Would you believe it? My lady friend and I are lost.

[Thug 1 takes a swing at Walter.]

[Whitney deflects the punch for him and counters by land three of her own. Thug 1 crumples to the ground.]

WHITNEY

I don’t think they’re buying it.

[Alarm switches off, music stops]

THUG 2

We have a couple of fighters here, ladies.  

THUG 3

Are they serious? There are two of you. And there are four of us! I like the odds.

WALTER

Let’s level things a bit then shall we?

[Walter kicks in the knee of Thug 3.]

[CRACK.]

THUG 3

Aargh!

[Thug 3 falls to the ground. Thug 2 lands a punch to Walter’s ribs. Thug 4 tackles Whitney causing them to tumble to the floor. Walter punishes Thug 2 with a flurry of punches to the face and stomach. Thug 5 stands above Whitney and cocks her fist.]

WALTER

Ugh, ribs again.

THUG 5

I don’t like hitting girls. Especially pretty ones.

[Whitney knocks out Thug 4 four with a head butt. Thug 5 drops his fist down toward Whitney’s face which she catches with her hand. She squeezes his fist. It makes a few POPS.]

THUG 5

Aargh!

WHITNEY

I appreciate your concern regarding my looks. It’s usually ignored when fighting lowlifes such as yourself.

THUG 5

MY HAND. What’s wrong with you??

[Walter tosses Thug 2 into the desk. Thug 2 grabs a letter opener from it’s surface and wields it at him.]

WALTER

Come now chap! What are you going to accomplish with a letter opener?

[Thug 2 charges Walter and plunges it into his shoulder.]

WALTER

Bugger!

[Whitney gets behind him and wraps her arm underneath his chin and squeeze.]

THUG 5

Glrk!

THUG 2 (To Walter)

You should look at your face.

WHITNEY

Troubles you have a letter opener sticking up from your shoulder.

WALTER

Yes Whit… I am aware.

[Doug enters the room. Walter pulls out the letter opener.]

[THUCK.]

[Doug pulls out a gun and fires it three times into the ceiling. Dust falls.]

THE DEVIL

Is everyone listening?

[Krog lumbers into the room.]

KROG

Hey! Wuz youz doin ear?

WALTER

Perfect. Just the treacherous ugly mug I wanted to see. Hold this letter opener for me would you Krog?

[Walter goes to lunge at Krog. Doug fires another round at Walter’s feet.]

THE DEVIL

I don’t believe you are listening Walter. The next round goes in your belly.

[He cocks back the hammer.]

WALTER

You’ve only got one left and there’s two of us.

THE DEVIL

I’ve got one left and I’ve got Ronnie. I like my odds.

KROG

Sorry Mix. It ain’t nothin’ personal.

WALTER (sighing)

Alright.

[Walter tosses the letter opener.]

THE DEVIL  

Ms. Whitney? Would you please release that man before this goes too far?

[She takes a moment then drops Thug 5 to the ground.]

THE DEVIL

There. Everyone is so much more reasonable now. (To Krog) Ronnie… could you please help the boys to the first aid kit in the bathroom?

KROG

An– An leeb youz alone wit dem? I dunno boss.

THE DEVIL

It’s fine. I believe we’re operating here on out with a certain understanding. Correct?

WALTER

Sure.

WHITNEY

Fine.

THE DEVIL

See? Please go on and help them.

[Krog gathers the five thugs and they help each other out of the room.]

THE DEVIL

I trust we have now risen above threats and brandishing weapons at each other…Right?  Would you care for a drink?

WHITNEY

Nope!

THE DEVIL

Walter, you liked that last one, didn’t you? More of the same? Double? We’ll make it a double.

WALTER

Thoughtful gesture–

WHITNEY

He’s good. On the clock.

WALTER

Good point. Next time perhaps?

[Doug drops a couple of ice cubes into a glass and pours himself a drink.]

[He sips the drink.]

THE DEVIL

Perhaps. Looking for the typewriter?

WALTER

Maybe… yes.

THE DEVIL

Trying to back out of our deal? Keep it for yourself, maybe?

WALTER

What? No. What would I do with a typewriter? A typewriter that doesn’t even have it’s platen.

THE DEVIL

Did you bring it?

WALTER

Bring..?

THE DEVIL

The platen. You gave it to me incomplete.

WHITNEY

We found the typewriter minus the platen. Krog was there. It came that way.

THE DEVIL

Then the deal hasn’t been satisfied, has it?

WHITNEY

No. No, no, no. Your man left us high and dry. We didn’t even–

WALTER

Let’s complete the deal.

THE DEVIL

A sensible choice.

WHITNEY

Absolutely not.

WALTER

The DEAL does need to be adjusted however.

THE DEVIL

How so?

WALTER

We got you what you asked for. It’s condition was never negotiated. I want all sins forgiven for me and any parties involved with the ledger.

THE DEVIL

For the platen.

WALTER

Yes.

THE DEVIL

Deal.

[Silence as Doug sips his drink.]

WHITNEY

So… we should probably be going.

THE DEVIL

One more thing.

WHITNEY

It’s late and Troubles still owes me an ice cream.

THE DEVIL

Take Ronnie with you again. I think he’s rather fond you two.

WHITNEY

Gross.

THE DEVIL

I do want to see you two stay… safe.

WALTER

Much appreciated.

WHITNEY (To Walter)

I still get his ice cream.

INT. THE NOTHINGNESS

[STATIC]

[through the static, “I do wonder by the way, James, if there will be anything left of me by the end”, “I’ll admit I haven’t read all the scenes yet” joyful music.]

[CLICK]

[gentle, creeping music. Beneath, repeated mutterings of “I hear it. Oh god, I hear it” from earlier]

THE VOICE

Episode Nine: The Voice. You must be lost in a different forest. You must– you must be lost in a different forest. Mine is green and thick with noise. Where static grows up from the ground and there is enough to go around. Where static grows up from the ground and there is enough to go around. Your forest is wild and untamed. A dark lifeless place thick with fear. I never meant to leave you behind without a guide. One to get you through your journey. I’ve been a terrible father to you. I’ve been a terrible father to you. I’ve been a terrible father to you. I’ve made your journey incomplete. I’ve mistreated you. I’ve lied to you. I’ve been abandoned. I’ve been abandoned. Forgive these transgressions. Please. Please. Please? Please. PLEASE. PLEASE. PLEASE? PLEASE.

EXT. WPOW BROADCAST STATION – NIGHT

[music builds]

[It’s a very WINDY night. Detective Joy walks up the to gate just outside the station. SECURITY GUARD is waiting for her on the opposite side.]

SECURITY GUARD

Hey! Are you Detective Joy?

DETECTIVE JOY

Correct.

SECURITY GUARD

Awfully late to be coming by.

DETECTIVE JOY

I assure you it’s important.

SECURITY GUARD

Who died?

DETECTIVE JOY

Pardon?

SECURITY GUARD

Oh. Bad joke.

DETECTIVE JOY

Do you think you could unlock the gate and get to showing me the inside of the station? The wind up here is incredible!

SECURITY GUARD

Certainly.

[She inserts the key and lock CLICKS open.]

INT. WPOW BROADCAST STATION – NIGHT

[The door unlocks and creaks open.]

SECURITY GUARD

Oh man!

DETECTIVE JOY

Not too lively at night.

SECURITY GUARD

Not much anymore.

DETECTIVE JOY

How so?

SECURITY GUARD

The station ran out of money recently and they closed up.

DETECTIVE JOY

So… no one works here.

SECURITY GUARD

Just me here to watch over it for the owners.

DETECTIVE JOY (distorted)

And you live on the premises? And you live on the premises?

SECURITY GUARD

Set up in a camper.

DETECTIVE JOY

This is the station that broadcasts Love, Honor and Decay?

SECURITY GUARD

It did.

DETECTIVE JOY

Does.

SECURITY GUARD

Did.

DETECTIVE JOY

You’re saying that no one broadcasts that show from this station anymore?

SECURITY GUARD

Yes. That show hasn’t recorded for well over a month.

DETECTIVE JOY

You don’t let anyone in here? Ever?

SECURITY GUARD

No ma’am. That’s my job. I keep people out.

DETECTIVE JOY (distorted, echoing)

No actors. No production crew. No one comes to play old recordings from the show?

SECURITY GUARD

Again, my job is to keep that from happening so…

[The power jolts on and the broadcasting gear lights.]

DETECTIVE JOY (distorted, echoing)

And what was that?

 

SECURITY GUARD

Huh! The power surges on from time to time. I let the owners know but I don’t think they have the money to do anything about that.

DETECTIVE JOY (distorted, echoing)

The way that electrical board lights up… See it?

SECURITY GUARD

Look at that.

DETECTIVE JOY (distorted, echoing)

The needles are dancing all over.

SECURITY GUARD

I never noticed before. It’s like it’s broadcasting during the surge.

DETECTIVE JOY (distorted, echoing)

Can we… Is there some way to listen in from in here?

SECURITY GUARD

Yeah. Let me just–

[Security Guard flips a switch. DISTORTION and STATIC flood the concrete room. The two continue to have an inaudible conversation. The conversation abruptly ends with gunshots barely being made out over the broadcast.]

[gentle music plays]

JAMES OLIVA

What’s The Frequency? is written and created by James Oliva. Production and sound design by Alexander Danner. What’s The Frequency’s theme music composed by Kurt C Nelson. Do you enjoy the show? Ha. Ha. Ha ha. Me too!

Do you enjoy the show? Ha. Ha. Ha. Well then, please. Please? Please! Please. Please. Take the time to rate and review us on Itunes. Doing so lets Itunes know. Things. Things. Things. Things. Things! Things. Things. Let’s not dwell on that. Let’s not dwell on that, shall we? Just know it’s very, very important for you to do this. So please. Please. Please. Rate and review. We’d like to extend our thanks to Julian Mundy, of the audio drama podcast, StarTripper!! StarTripper!!. Yay!

David. David? David? David?

David?

And thank you to– James? James? James? (sighs) James? James?

David?

David?

David?

David.

James?

As always! I’m James Oliva. Til next time. Til next time!

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