[CLICK]
[STATIC]
[SCATTING]
[CLICK]
INT. WALTER’S OFFICE APARTMENT – DAY
WHITNEY
Let’s see. Six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven… twelve and thirteen. Hmmm. Each one addressed to a Gabriel Black. Oh. Let me write that down. Right, okay.
[scribbling]
WHITNEY
(Sounding it out) Gabriel Black. From Connie Killmeister. Jeez lady of all the names. Killmeister. Really. Let’s go by send date, in any case. Right. A year ago this past May.
[rustling, ripping]
WHITNEY
“Not important.” What the hay? That’s all it says… “Not important.”
[rustling]
WHITNEY
Set that aside… moving on to the next one. This reads… “Not important.” What is this? I don’t get it. Okay. Let’s just skip to end… lucky number thirteen. Sent… just five weeks ago.
[Clears throat]
WHITNEY
Dear Gabriel.
INT. THE NOTHINGNESS –
[Whitney’s voice gives way to Connie’s.]
CONNIE [Echoed, Radio distortion]
Dear Gabriel. I am of the belief now that you are not receiving these letters. I am to assume that Mr. Fine or possibly one of his minions have blocked me from communicating with you. But just in case this does find it’s way into your rugged, yet delicate hands, I will restate why it is dire that we talk. If this is in fact but a demon spawned from Terry Fine’s rib meat, I will not be stating anything you don’t already know.
[Pause]
Gabriel. My love. You are in great danger. There are those who covet your gifts. You’re ability to bring words to life. They want this for themselves and will stop at nothing to make what is yours, theirs. I am lucky. Most of the world considers me crazy. I am easily dismissed. Never by you. You are unlike any other. From the moment you valiantly provided me with what was clearly, at the very least, your second favorite pen when I could not locate my own. I knew you were reaching out to me. Your modesty is a trait I may like best. We both know your name. Your REAL name. As you consider a usefulness to my undying loyalty, I will await your further instruction from the confines of Periculum Inn two miles south of your writers cabin. Even now I tremble with anticipation. Love.
INT. WALTER’S OFFICE APARTMENT – DAY
WHITNEY
Connie Killmeister. Holy carrots and peas.
[CLICK.]
[STATIC]
[Background voice]
UNIDENTIFIED CHARACTER 3:14
[listing numbers]
INT. THE NOTHINGNESS –
[LHD Theme.]
[Door opens.]
DONALD [Radio distortion]
Honey! I’m home!
[He shuts the door behind him.]
LOUISE [Clear voice]
Books.
DONALD
My love… what is the matter?
LOUISE
BOOKS!
DONALD
Darling?
LOUISE
Books books books book books.
DONALD
Yes. Those are our books.
LOUISE
Books!
DONALD
You have put them all over the floor.
LOUISE
BOOOOOOOOOKSSSSSSS!
DONALD
YEEEEEESSSSSS! And you’ve made quite a mess! There are first editions here I’ll have you know!
LOUISE
Books. Book book books. Books books book.
DONALD
You won’t get anywhere with such a sloppy search. Really Louise… if Neville wants my brother’s book, and only the lord would know why, he will have to come to me himself.
LOUISE
Book.
DONALD
He’s dead… it happened right in front of me.
LOUISE
Books? Book book?
DONALD
I don’t want to talk about it.
LOUISE
(crying)
Booooooooks.
DONALD
Will you please put these books back on the shelf?
[STATIC.]
[CLICK.]
[SCATTING]
[STATIC.]
[CLICK.]
INT. DETECTIVE JOY’S OFFICE – DAY
DETECTIVE JOY
So our guy stumbles into the restaurant and rants and raves about the keys he needs to for the net. He says he needs the keys for a… big daddy? Did you write that correctly? Keets?
KEETS
Yes! Detective Joy… I’m sorry, I believe the owner said it was for big dada.
DETECTIVE JOY
Okay. Somebody named Big Dada.
KEETS
What kind of name is that?
DETECTIVE JOY [Distorted]
It’s a gang name.
KEETS
Of course.
DETECTIVE JOY [Normal]
Can you have one of the girls head to the file room and see if we have anything on an A.K.A. Big Dada?
KEETS
Sure.
DETECTIVE JOY
Better yet put Barton on it. Seems his speed.
KEETS
Oh, that’s just mean.
DETECTIVE JOY
Well, if he’d learn to be one us he’d have an easier time around here.
KEETS
Ah, Barton’s a smart cop. He’ll come down from his high tower and join the club. We just need to grind down his edges some more.
DETECTIVE JOY
Take that file to him and see what he gets.
[Keets fumbles the file and several others fall off Joy’s desk and onto the floor.]
KEETS
Darn!
DETECTIVE JOY
Careful– careful there. Don’t mix up the papers, butter fingers.
[Keets gathers the files back together.]
KEETS
What’s this one from?
DETECTIVE JOY
Oh. That was our second victim in this madness outbreak.
KEETS
Moira Kowalski.
DETECTIVE JOY
Pretty thing wasn’t she?
[Keets flips page]
KEETS
This is Douglas Kowalski’s wife?
DETECTIVE JOY
Some filth stopped her in broad daylight and threw her through a plate glass window just outside of Abraham and Strauss. Tore her to ribbons.
KEETS
Shit, how’d he take it?
DETECTIVE JOY
You’re kidding right? How would you feel if someone murdered your wife?
[CLICK.]
[SCATTING.]
[CLICK.]
KEETS
I would burn the world to the ground.
DETECTIVE JOY [Distorted]
You bet your ass you would. The good news is that she didn’t suffer any. The cuts were so deep the blood left her before she knew her time had run out.
KEETS
God. Have you…? Have you spoken to… The Devil?
DETECTIVE JOY [Normal]
One foot in front of the other. This new fellow is the only one of interest to you. Let me worry about Mrs. Kowal–[Cuts abruptly.]
[CLICK.]
[STATIC]
[Radio piece,“like rotten eggs”]
[STATIC]
[CLICK.]
INT. KOWALSKI HOME STUDY – DAY
[scribbling, writing]
[gentle music]
THE DEVIL
My Dearest Moira. If I was any kind of man I would be writing you this letter on a typewriter. Instead I am reduced to this useless pen and an unsatisfyingly plain piece of paper. Like a castrato on his eleventh birthday I am impotent to change our situation. But I shouldn’t invoke such crudity. You have made it clear on many of occasion that you find that to be an ill fitting suit every time I put it on. I will refrain my love. Without you here I find many things difficult. [cuts abruptly]
[SCATTING]
[CLICK]
I had never realized how much of my humanity is owed to you. If I were to look back on the man I was before our union, I mean, you would see nothing but a feral child. Though I am certain you must have been aware of my youthful short comings, I do not believe you ever saw the beast–[cuts abruptly]
[SHORT SCATTING]
[Resumes]–that lurked inside. And I am thankful for that. I worry sometimes that you blame me for what happened to you. Though it was in your nature to forgive, it’s hard for one to assume you would have room to forgive me for this shortcoming. If I could just type this letter instead I would be able to hold you in my arms again. If I am the man I thought I was, that is what would be. For now, for now we must settle for the man I appear to be. One that is left holding this infernal pen! When next I write to you I promise to breathe life into these words. I hope this will be sooner than later as I feel less and less like a human–[cuts abruptly]
[SCATTING]
[CLICK]
[Resumes]–and more and more like the beast. I will keep searching my love. Until next time. Yours truly. Douglas.
INT. THE NOTHINGNESS –
[CLICK]
[STATIC]
MISSY
So ladies, are we alone?
[CLICK]
[Triumphant music]
[CLICK]
MISSY [DEEP VOICE]
Are we alone? Good.
[HIGH PITCH STATIC]
MISSY [NORMAL]
Good. Now that it’s just us [cuts abruptly]
[DISTORTED MUSIC, RHYTHMIC STATIC]
MISSY
Ladies, are we alone? Good. Now that it’s just us girls I can share my secret on looking this good everyday. What is that secret?
[Angelic music]
Well sometimes I fantasize about soaking my living room in gasoline, striking a match and watching the flames dance around the room. Are my husband and children home? I’m not sure. What’s most important is that I’m free of this morbid existence and I finally get to spend time with ME.
[Playful music]
Taking the time to indulge in fantasy is one way to keep your youthful bounce. But for those of us with no imagination, there is a product just for you. Spishak’s specially formulated Age BeGone Vanishing cream. Like no other vanishing cream on the market Age BeGone melts the wrinkles from your face using potentially dangerous levels of hydrochloric acid. Just apply a thin layer around your entire face. Be careful to leave some distance from your eyes. Do you feel it tingling? Good. That means it’s working. Do you feel it burning?
MISSY [DISTORTED, SPED UP]
Do you feel it burning? That means you’ve exceeded the recommended amount for application. Using household baking powder, liberally apply powder over your entire face. Then, go see your doctor for further instructions.
MISSY [NORMAL]
With Age BeGone women fretting over losing their looks when hitting the big two five will fret no more. The fine men of Spishak’s science department have made sure of that.
MISSY [DISTORTED, SPED UP]
These very same men would also have me advise if you happen to be turning the big three zero, it’s recommended you eat the cream directly from the container. For this particular problem area all of the cream is the recommended dosage.
MISSY [NORMAL]
So ladies give yourself and your husband the gift that keeps giving. Your eternal beauty.
[music ends]
[STATIC.]
[CLICK.]
DISTORTED VOICE
This… what is this?
[STATIC.]
[CLICK.]
EXT. JULIAN ELLS FAMILY HOME – DAY
[Walter and Krog sit in the car.]
WALTER
Would you mind taking a look in that mailbox.
KROG
Uh. Deez one?
WALTER
That’s right.
[Rolls window down, opens mailbox. Rolls window back up]
KROG
R yoo shur Miz Whitney’s gunna be okay whit dis?
WALTER
What makes you believe I require her permission, chum?
KROG
Cuz… sheez ya ole laydee en sheez aint neva gonna let you ear dee endofit.
WALTER
Is that what you believe?
KROG
Wuz iz she’den?
WALTER
I’ll have you know that there was no Miss Whitney before 10 years ago.
[Adventurous music]
WALTER
I know sounds impossible, improbable or even preposterous! Yet nonetheless true. This was back when I was on sabbatical, far east in the Orient. The pressures of being the exemplary private dick had begun to take its toll. I was beginning to feel washed up. Yesterday’s news if you will. I had befriended a local guide who worried for my health and urged me to see a local occultist and holistic doctor. While under his care I was found to be suffering from conjoined soul entanglement. That gentleman took me into his care and preformed a series of intricate incantations. In the end the procedure was successful. My soul became untangle from the conjoined twin soul and in doing so Miss Whitney materialized from the ether. I’ve never seen or heard of anything like it but there she was. A fully formed being. I’ve taken care of her ever since. She is my “twin soul” as it were.
[music ends]
KROG
Wow.
WALTER
Do plan to stand there all day gobsmacked or will be handing over the letters you’ve procured for us?
KROG
Uh, uh. Ear.
WALTER
Thank you. (Beat) It’s amazing what you learn from another man’s mail.
KROG
Wyze yous doen axe hiz wyf?
WALTER
Because… I don’t yet know why Carmen would exclude the brother and the money loans to said brother in the initial statement. You see Krog–
KROG
Ronnie.
WALTER
-in this business you have to sometimes think like one of the bad guys. Sometimes you even need to break the law like one of the bad guys so that you can do a good guy thing.
KROG
Soe youz komit feredal oh-fense soz youz can do sum good?
WALTER
You are a very perceptive man. A very large… but aware man.
KROG
Tanks. (beat) Wutz dis got tu doe whif findinn duh typewritter?
WALTER
I said you’re preceptive not omniscient.
KROG
Kneeshunt?
WALTER
Later. It’s now or never. Ready?
KROG
Ready.
[Walter and Krog exit the car and walk up to the front door. Walter knocks. His knock gently creaks the door open.]
KROG
Unlukt?
WALTER
That’s uncommon for the record.
[door creaks]
KROG
Youz want mee to go furst?
WALTER
Uh… no. I go first. We wouldn’t want to alarm anyone with your… presence.
KROG
Suitz yur shelf.
WALTER
Yes. That exactly.
[They both enter the house.]
WALTER
Hello?
KROG
Hello?
[They make their way to LIVING ROOM]
[dripping/splashing noises]
WALTER
Whoa! (Pause) Excuse… excuse me?
KROG
HEY!
KEMLER
Hi.
WALTER
Yes. Hello. I’m a private investigator. My name is Walter Mix.
KEMLER
Oh! Oh good.
[Dripping/splashing continues]
WALTER
You are?
KEMLER
I’m the police.
WALTER
(To himself) As confirmed by your attire. (Beat) Can you tell me what happened here?
KEMLER
Oh, these ones? These ones are dead.
WALTER
Do they have names?
KEMLER
Nuh uh. D-E-A-D. Dead. As door nails. You know?
WALTER
What are you doing?
KEMLER
I was told to collect the blood.
WALTER
Perhaps with a cloth or um–
KEMLER
No. No, no reason to make something all messy. No. Mm-mm. My hands are fine.
WALTER
Is this the Ells family?
KEMLER
It does feel strange between fingers. It’s on the outside, not the inside. You know? Hm.
WALTER
Is that Julian Ells?
KEMLER
I think these two are women. That’s a big one and that’s a little one.
KROG
Mix… Dis feels wrong.
WALTER
(To Krog) Too late to back out now. We bought the cow so to speak. (To Kemler) So the one with the axe in his head–
[electric distortion]
[music starts]
KEMLER
WHAT?WHAT?WHAT? You are making me careless. Look! I’m getting the blood everywhere! I have to do this job right. (inhales) Of course that’s Julian. That’s his favorite axe.
WALTER
Any leads?
KEMLER
Leads?
WALTER
Any leads as to who did this?
KEMLER
Do you know what time it is?
WALTER
I’m sorry?
KEMLER
Do you know what time it is? The time. I… I don’t want to miss the next broadcast.
[Krog checks his watch.]
KROG
Liddle hand sayz four. Beeg hand sayz fortee-too.
KEMLER
Mmm! Only two more hours of scooping up this blood and then I can finally relax to Love, Honor and Decay. Do you listen to it as well?
WALTER
I’ve heard wonderful things.
[Walter begins to walk away.]
KEMLER
You’re leaving?
WALTER
Yes. So sorry. Good luck!
KEMLER
Ok. You can stay though.
WALTER
That’s fine.
KEMLER
We can sit on the couch and listen to the show… together! Okay? You can stay though. We can sit on the couch and listen to the show… together!
WALTER
No thank you! Lovely offer though.
KEMLER
Why are you backing away like that? You don’t like me? You don’t want to stay and watch the show?
KROG
Ohkay.
[Walter and Krog exit quickly.]
KEMLER
SUIT YOURSELF!!! SELF! YOURSELF!
[electric distortion]
SUIT YOURSELF!!! SELF! YOURSELF! SUIT IT! HA!
[distorted laughter, echoing]
[CLICK.]
[STATIC]
INT. THE NOTHINGNESS –
THE VOICE
Muscle threaded onto muscle. Vein by vein. I am rebuilding. Rebuilding the man. Rebuilding the voice. The pace is consistent and the forest is thick with noise. So thick it’s hard to breathe… if I could breathe. The static grows up from the ground. All the sounds are here. Pulling them apart. Trying to decode the message… What was the frequency..? What was the frequency..? What was the frequency..?
THE VOICE [HIGH, simultaneous]
Are you receiving this message? Are you receiving this message? Are you receiving this message? Are you receiving this message?
THE VOICE [DEEP, simultaneous]
What’s the frequency? What’s the frequency? What’s the frequency? Do my words die? Do my words die? Somewhere out in the static and the wild? Can there be a place where they can meet? Your ear. Your ear. The voice. Can you hear it? Can you hear it? Can you hear it? Can you hear me? Can you hear me? Can you hear me? Can you find the way? Can you find the way? Can– can you find the way? Can you find the way? Can you please find the– [cuts abruptly]
[Music plays]
INT. ELLS FAMILY HOME STUDY – DAY
[CLICK.]
[Carmen starts the reel to reel audio playback.]
JOSEPH [Warbly recording]
Chapter eight. As it was with most summer nights in the alley behind Gertie’s Catch of the Day diner, Bennie needed to ration his own need for air. He would wait a few more minutes for his employer to arrive. Any longer than that and Bennie might not be found on his feet. An empty can darts across the alley. Ricocheting between the trash cans and the brick wall. At the far end a shadowy, backlit figure walks towards him at a steady pace. Bennie places his hand on the grip of his gun, just in case. The figure comes closer. “Nice night.” Bennie utters plainly. The figure catches the light of an overhead lamp. It is in fact the man he’s been waiting on. Vincent looked a bit pensive and one couldn’t imagine that changing with the news Bennie brought. What exactly was so special about this pen anyways? Bennie would need to press –ordinary even for him.
[Tape reel spins out]
WHITNEY
And how many of these audio reels do you have?
CARMEN
Just the two… so far.
TRUDY
Joseph seems to have hidden these throughout the house.
WHITNEY
Lovely.
TRUDY
We’re still working at tearing the place apart.
WHITNEY
Yes, that’s clear, and–
TRUDY
We do expect to find more.
WHITNEY
And by the home I can see you two are doing a thorough job.
(To Carmen) Julian Ells.
CARMEN
Joseph’s brother. Is he okay?
WHITNEY
Walter is interviewing him now. Why didn’t you tell us about him before?
CARMEN
It didn’t seem relevant.
WHITNEY
Relevant. Relevant! I do you think you could be forthcoming with information from here on out? Leaving the professionals to suss out what’s relevant.
CARMEN
I’m sorry, don’t you think you’re being just a little bit–
WHITNEY
Were you aware that your husband was lending money to his brother?
CARMEN
I had no idea. I just thought that if Julian knew where he was he would have called me.
WHITNEY
Why would he do that?
CARMEN
He stopped by looking Joseph just three days before I contacted you.
WHITNEY
Does he often come by?
CARMEN
What are you implying?
WHITNEY
Just ascertaining the facts.
TRUDY
(Pointed) Well ascertain a new tone before I toss you out of this house little miss.
WHITNEY
Your name again?
TRUDY
Trudy.
WHITNEY
Okay Trudy, maybe I am a little too hot under the collar. (Beat) Right. This line of work is built on the foundation of information. Faulty or concealed information can lead to a less than desirable result. I keep Troubles safe from the dangers that naturally arise with the job. Do you see where the issue lies with this?
TRUDY
What danger?
WHITNEY
All of them.
CARMEN
I promise you that I knew nothing about him loaning money Julian.
WHITNEY
Alright then. Walter will be back soon and we’ll find out what the brother may or may not know. Till then I just have one question yet answered.
CARMEN
Ms. Whitney please. I do want to find my hus–
[STATIC]
CARMEN
I do want to find–
[STATIC]
CARMEN
Ms. Whitney please.
[STATIC]
CARMEN
–find my husband.
WHITNEY
I know. (beat) Can you tell me about someone by the name of Connie?
CARMEN
No. I don’t know a Connie. Does– does my husband?
WHITNEY
That remains unclear at the moment. I have just one more name for you. Gabriel Black?
CARMEN
I’ve never heard of him either. I’m sorry.
TRUDY (interrupting)
Gabriel Black?
WHITNEY
Yes. Do you know him?
TRUDY
Not really. He writes trashy romance novels.
WHITNEY
Another writer?
[Trudy rummages through piles of books on the floor.]
TRUDY
Here.
[She tosses the book to Whitney who catches it.]
TRUDY
One of the few books on the shelf that is an actual real book.
WHITNEY
By George, Trudy! I could kiss you.
TRUDY
Really?
WHITNEY
Wait. What did you mean by one of the few real book–?
INT. MR. WU’S REPAIR SHOP – NIGHT
[Archie locks the front door and flips over the open sign to closed.]
LILLIAN
So Archie… shall we eat out tonight?
ARCHIE
I don’t know.
LILLIAN
We can stay home.
[ratchet noises/tool sounds]
ARCHIE
Whatever you want Lil.
LILLIAN
I’ll cook something up. Like dad would do for mom when she was…
ARCHIE
Dying?
LILLIAN
I was going to say unhappy. He had a way with that. He’d find scraps from around the kitchen. A nub of ginger. A potato. Chicken trimmings from a few days earlier and somehow he make it seem like a feast.
ARCHIE
Like, uh Jesus and his loafs of bread.
LILLIAN
Yeah. A little like that.
ARCHIE
He really loved her.
LILLIAN
Yeah…
ARCHIE
I miss her… and dad.
LILLIAN
I know. You were lucky though… she taught you the repair business.
ARCHIE
And dad taught you everything he knew about Eastern medicine… I sometimes wished he had taught me-
LILLIAN
And mom taught me repair! But I think they got us right.
ARCHIE
I think so.
LILLIAN
What did they teach Barton?
ARCHIE
Ethics and morality?
LILLIAN
The same thing that dad died from.
[Silence.]
ARCHIE
I don’t know if I’m hungry.
LILLIAN
Arch… Barton is being foolish. You understand that right?
ARCHIE
Really?
LILLIAN
Living in the past brings only death. Nothing Barton can do will change dad being dead.
ARCHIE
It might bring a little justice to this world. What’s wrong with a little justice?
LILLIAN
This isn’t little though.
ARCHIE
Aren’t you tired of being under the weight of all the everyday evils? The police? All those white folk who look the other way? What’s wrong with wanting a little justice?
LILLIAN
There’s nothing wrong with justice. What would be justice for you? So you take down a couple of cops? Then what? You haven’t beaten evil. You haven’t ended corruption. You’ve maybe taken one brick from a giant wall.
ARCHIE
Unlikely? Sure. What’s the alternative then? Live our lives with our chins buried in our chests? Is that the future dad wanted for us?
[Typewriter noises]
LILLIAN
Which future do you think he wanted more for you? One where you’ve avenged his death or the one where you’re alive and well?
[A car screeches to a stop.]
ARCHIE Wha-?
LILLIAN
Oh, my god! Get–
[Several guns go off.
POP.
POP.
POP.
The storefront window shatters.]
[Silence.]
RIP [Offscreen]
Hey! Tell Barton to come see us when he gets the chance! (laughs)
LILLIAN
Archie!?! Are you ok? Arch!?!
[a single piece of glass falls]
ARCHIE [Speech impaired]
I’m okay! (pause) Who’s blood is this?
[Title sequence plays.]
[Peppy piano music]
“JAMES OLIVA”
What’s The Frequency? is written and created by James Oliva. Production and sound design by Alexander Danner. What’s The Frequency’s theme music composed by Kurt C Nelson. This episode contained audio from the 1946 film “Angel on My Shoulder”, as well as “To Greater Boston” by Alexander Danner and Jeff Van Dreason, and an excerpt from “The Invisible Sun” by Siclorance. (?)
If you enjoy the show, please let us know what you think! You have several options in how you’d like to express your feelings about us. One way is to take the time to rate and review us on Itunes. The more of you that take the time to do this, the more visibility you give the show, which is a good thing. Secondly, you can email us at wtfrequency [tongue click] Which is a good thing. Secondly, you can email us at wtfrequency@gmail.com to communicate a more pointed way of describing your feelings. Lastly, you can contribute to our patreon campaign at patreon.com/wtfrequency where you can choose what level of support you’re comfortable with, and we will show our appreciation to you by bestowing additional exclusive material.
We’d like to give special thanks to Jonathan Goldberg of the audio drama podcast “Fall of the House of Sunshine”, and Isaac Christie and Hari Rai Khalsa of the audio drama podcast “Radiation World”. As always, I’m James Oliva. Until next time. [giggle]
What's The Frequency? 